Tag Archives: embarassed

Illusory Superiority

Alternate title: My overconfidence is my weakness.
Alternate, alternate title:
Jasyla’s ego takes a massive hit.

Over the last 2 weeks, Apotheosis has spent a lot of time working on Alysrazor. A LOT of time. We ran into many problems along the course of our progression through the fight: members of the flight team plummeting to their deaths, tank deaths, people standing in Lava Spew, and the tornados – sweet Elune, the tornados. As we learned the fight we’d get further and further, and eventually everything would come together in the first phase, the tanks would live and kill their hatchlings in good time, the flight team would soar like eagles and the rest of the raid would avoid Lava Spew and Brushfires. Then the tornados would spawn and BAM! 70% of the raid would spontaneously combust.

As a healer, I always felt extremely powerless at this point. When someone takes 135,000 damage over a span of half a second, there’s not much I can do to save them. When 15 people take 135,000 damage over half a second all I can do is cry silently into my branches and hope people will get better at dodging for the next attempt.

As our Alysrazor attempts went on, we ran into problems with tornados again and again, but it got a little bit better every time. Instead of 70% of the raid exploding, only half the raid did, then only 25%, then only a couple of people. In the 28 failed attempts I took part in over 3 nights I only died to tornados once, the very first time we got to that phase. Though my healer ego wept over the people I couldn’t save, my raider ‘peen skyrocketed over how awesome I was at living until the bitter end.

On our most recent night of Alysrazor attempts we wiped 14 times, and though we were greatly improving, we still had Tornado deaths every time they spawned. I, who had yet to die to a Tornado that night, began to feel superior and have uncharitable thoughts about those who were dying. And I got cocky. As soon as tornados would spawn I’d run around, chase and strafe, while trying to continue to put out as much healing as I could to help the people who were getting hit. I knew I was clipping the tornados occasionally, but figured as long as I’m not dying, who cares? Then came attempt 15, which would turn into kill #1. Tornados spawned and I got sloppy –  I got hit by 6 of them and dropped like a sack of potatoes. I got a rez once they were gone and we got through another set of phases. Tornados spawned for the second time and I got hit 4 times while healing everyone but myself. Dead again. Luckily, though people started dropping like flies, 3 members of our awesome flight team managed to live and proceeded to take Alysrazor down from 20% to dead while the rest of the raid lay massacred on the ground below. (PS. I love you flight team <3).

I was ecstatic about the kill, but pretty upset with myself for dying twice after 14 attempts of what I believed to be near-perfect play on my part. I got over it though, I told myself “Jasyla, you were so awesome on the first 14 attempts, you can’t blame yourself too much for getting a little tired and sloppy on the 15th.” I even believed myself – until I looked at the logs for total Tornado damage:

Alysrazor - Tornado damage

Umm...my cat jumped on my keyboard?

When I saw this I was torn between 2 reactions. First, I wanted to crawl under a rock and hide. Then I wanted to laugh hysterically. The mental image I had of myself deftly dodging every threat in my path was shattered. I wasn’t better at tornado dodging than anyone, I was worse than everyone. The only thing I had on my side was the fact that I’m a healer and could powerheal through my avoidance failures. If I had been a dps, I probably would have died on every attempt.

So, what’s the point of this post, other than to embarass myself? I’m actually not sure. I guess I just wanted to communicate that while I think it’s great to be confident in your abilities, everyone is susceptible to screw-ups. Before you start feeling too proud of yourself make sure you’re playing in a way that is deserving of pride. When you do screw up, accept it, learn from it and do better next time. I promise I will not be hitting so many tornados next time I face Alysrazor.

In the words of Han Solo, “Don’t get cocky, kid.”